Easter is just over and I hope everyone had a great easter and ate their body weight in chocolate because I certainly did.
I'm not really sure how to approach this topic or really how to put what I have in my head into words. But in case you didn't know i'm a very down to earth person who is kind, generous, hard working but I also don't like change or trying new things. I have been this way for as long as I can remember being places i've never been before I will think of every possible situation that can happen and kind of freak myself out. People say that I isolate myself like if I am invited to go to a club or to a party with know one I know, or if I only know 1 person I won't go. This is because well I never drink, and going to a club involves drinking and I've never been drunk before and that scares me that I might do something i'll regret. Plus anyways know one is ever interested in me, I know I'm self conscious but when you go to these places its just the small girls that get the atention. I love to travel which of course involves going to new places but I find that sometimes the excitement and just the comfort of my family or friends helps me tremendously.
What brought this whole topic up was I was out with someone I won't say names but I was invited out with them and I denied it because I know what they are like when they have had a few drinks that I would be ditched and they would run off with someone else. I made up some form of excuse which I normally do, I know I shouldn't but I just can't confront them about it yet. Anyways I asked how the event went, they were like awesome I was so drunk, everyone there was awesome we did shots, played tons of games did body shots etc. Now we were in a public place and I know that they talked louder about certain parts of there story because there was a hot guy near them. Its like really is that how you want to draw attention. They got made at me for not showing up, I was like I'm sorry but you also know that drinking and parting is not my thing. There immediate response was You Got To Get Over It. Then and there I have never felt so down, everything around me was just a blur and I had a sudden urge to run, but I didn't I just did what I always do play it clue and pretended like nothing was said. But deep down I was hurt, I can't believe they said that to me. I can;t believe my reaction to just Get Over It.
It isn't something I can just get over, i've been this way forever. Sorry if I'm shelter or terrified to try new things. I'm sorry if I'm the 20 something year old that has no awesome drunk or guy story. I'm sorry that i'd rather spent my nights home watching a movie or on the internet. I'm sorry that I still haven't had a serious relationship. But guess what thats me and if you don't like it then so be it.
I hope what i've written has made some sense but I find it hard to write about person issues and i'm not sure how or what to write as I'm unsure how people will take it. Like will they take this post as a joke or take it seriously.
As i'm writing this post I know that I need to Get Over It but I just can't flick a switch and make the change happen. I need to take baby steps at my own pace, so who knows how long it will take me to get their but I will get their one day hopefully.
I'm not really sure how to approach this topic or really how to put what I have in my head into words. But in case you didn't know i'm a very down to earth person who is kind, generous, hard working but I also don't like change or trying new things. I have been this way for as long as I can remember being places i've never been before I will think of every possible situation that can happen and kind of freak myself out. People say that I isolate myself like if I am invited to go to a club or to a party with know one I know, or if I only know 1 person I won't go. This is because well I never drink, and going to a club involves drinking and I've never been drunk before and that scares me that I might do something i'll regret. Plus anyways know one is ever interested in me, I know I'm self conscious but when you go to these places its just the small girls that get the atention. I love to travel which of course involves going to new places but I find that sometimes the excitement and just the comfort of my family or friends helps me tremendously.
What brought this whole topic up was I was out with someone I won't say names but I was invited out with them and I denied it because I know what they are like when they have had a few drinks that I would be ditched and they would run off with someone else. I made up some form of excuse which I normally do, I know I shouldn't but I just can't confront them about it yet. Anyways I asked how the event went, they were like awesome I was so drunk, everyone there was awesome we did shots, played tons of games did body shots etc. Now we were in a public place and I know that they talked louder about certain parts of there story because there was a hot guy near them. Its like really is that how you want to draw attention. They got made at me for not showing up, I was like I'm sorry but you also know that drinking and parting is not my thing. There immediate response was You Got To Get Over It. Then and there I have never felt so down, everything around me was just a blur and I had a sudden urge to run, but I didn't I just did what I always do play it clue and pretended like nothing was said. But deep down I was hurt, I can't believe they said that to me. I can;t believe my reaction to just Get Over It.
It isn't something I can just get over, i've been this way forever. Sorry if I'm shelter or terrified to try new things. I'm sorry if I'm the 20 something year old that has no awesome drunk or guy story. I'm sorry that i'd rather spent my nights home watching a movie or on the internet. I'm sorry that I still haven't had a serious relationship. But guess what thats me and if you don't like it then so be it.
I hope what i've written has made some sense but I find it hard to write about person issues and i'm not sure how or what to write as I'm unsure how people will take it. Like will they take this post as a joke or take it seriously.
As i'm writing this post I know that I need to Get Over It but I just can't flick a switch and make the change happen. I need to take baby steps at my own pace, so who knows how long it will take me to get their but I will get their one day hopefully.
